Anyway, I had fun making up the unreasonable requests. Here they are:
- Hey, can I have fifty dollars?
- Hey, can I have a big hug and kiss?
- Hey, I need someplace to crash tonight, but I’m not sure what time it’ll be. Would you just leave your front door unlocked so I can come in whenever?
- I know you’ve got a huge final tomorrow morning, but my friend is only in town tonight and we want to play some deafeningly loud music all night. That’s okay with you, isn’t it?
- So I get all these hilarious jokes in my email about politics and race and sex and things, but then I feel left out because I have no one to forward them to. Mind if I start sending them all to you?
- My kid is selling candy bars for a band trip, but no one’s buying and this is the last day. Could you buy five hundred dollars’ worth?
- Could you type up my senior capstone for me? And parts of it aren’t really written yet, so could you write those?
- Hey, I’m going to an unlicensed bungee jumping place and it’s going to be a blast. Come with me!
- Wow, I forgot my toothbrush. Could I borrow yours?
- You’ll do me a big favor and babysit my nineteen Ritalin-addicted children tonight, right?
- I really need to test my eighteen-wheeler’s brakes. Would you go lie down on the driveway?
- I’m training my pit bull, Susan, to protect the house. Would you put on this jumpsuit made of beef and let her chase you?
- So my grandma gave me this rifle for my birthday and I need to break in the scope. Would you put this apple on your head?
- Wow, I’m wearing brand new underwear today, and it’s really itchy and uncomfortable. Could we swap?
- I’m feeling a little judged right now. Would you please renounce Christ and embrace Satan for me?
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